Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
