6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Randomize
