Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Randomize
