So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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