I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.