I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize