He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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