porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
what day is it and did you see me today?
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Randomize
