i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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