turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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