Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize