okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
