LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
