You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
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