Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
