So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
of course. lets lasso hookers.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I can't trust your balls anymore.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
