Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
