doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
can u get pink eye on your cock?
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
