Midget sex pt 2 tonight
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
