How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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