I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
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