yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Randomize
