marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
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