Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
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