I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
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