Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
