Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
my being single is dangerous.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Randomize
