I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.