im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
