I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
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