i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
as a side note pls kill me
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
