Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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