I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
