Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
