I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Randomize