you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize