It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
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