No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
