O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
