Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
Randomize
