Can Purell be used as lube?
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize