i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
