I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
There r osticjed everywhere
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
