So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
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It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
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Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
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