on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Randomize
