Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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