He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
