My hair reeks of homosexuality.
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
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