If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize