The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
