just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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